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1. He doesn’t feel good enough for you.

“One of the most common questions I get asked is: ‘What makes me special? I feel like a pretty girl has so many other better guys to choose from.’ Guys, like women, are inundated with stereotypes and expectations about what kind of lifestyle we should have and be able to offer a girl,” says Todd. “This high bar leaves a lot of guys feeling inadequate, and many great guys end up not approaching girls as a result.”

How you can help him out: “Womankind in general can do a lot by not perpetuating the stereotype that every guy should be like the Old Spice dude,” Todd says. “I think it’s fair to say, most of you would prefer an interesting and ambitious guy over a walking Brooks Brothers stereotype. So don’t be afraid to let men in on that secret.”

2. He has no idea what to say to you.

According to Todd, a lot of men find their minds going completely blank when they’re trying to think of what to say once they’ve approached a girl. “There is so much pressure on crafting that first sentence, but, in reality, any opening line that doesn’t provoke an immediate slap can work if the conversation backing it up is compelling,” he says.

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Reasons Guys Aren’t Asking You Out  was originally published on