The majority of arguments that couples have are over sex. Hopefully you and your partner have compatible sex drives, or at the very least you’d accept each other’s differences. Although either one of these may be the case, the one of you still may have fluctuations in your sex mood and functioning. It is inevitable, sometimes you will be out of sync with your partner. But don’t fret! You need to be able to accept these changes and life. Many changes and life affect your sex drive such as getting married, having children, or changing jobs. The important thing to do is face whatever problems you’re having.
Sometimes on occasion, one partner in a relationship may want sex more than the other. You need to be particularly wary of this. The partner being pressured may feel additional stress and become more shut down, physically and emotionally, from feeling pressure. If you’re in the situation you need to pull back and stop pressuring the other person so much. This can give the other person a chance to build up interests and restore desire. Remember sex should take each person’s feelings into consideration.
Everyone’s attitudes about sex affect their sex drive. Many women are taught to act “proper” when it comes to sex. This in turn inhibits their sex drive. On the opposite end of the spectrum, men are taught to always be ready to have sex. You need to learn to push these thoughts out of your head. If you’re having other feelings that inhibit your sex drive, such as anger, stress, or any other real problems you also need to force those out of your head. Feeling such as these can dampen your sex drive.
Whatever may be causing you to pull away from sex, you need to compromise and learn to balance your sex drives. For example, you could alternate weeks where each person gets their way. However you determined to solve the problem, you should make sure it is an equal compromise. Neither person shall feel bitter about the agreement. If these problems continued to persist over a long period of time, you may need to see a therapist.
