Are you finding that you are losing yourself in the midst of the relationship which you are currently in? Are you ready to regain control in your relationship so that you can be yourself again? Do you find that you are having trouble being with a man and maintaining your independence at the same time? If so, then keep reading and learn how to take control of your relationship again.
First, you have to let go of the need to be validated by him. This means that your validation comes from you and you alone. When you give someone the power to validate you then you also give them the power to invalidate you. This is the primary thing which causes a person to lose control of their own choices
The second thing which you need to do is give the relationship some space. It is far too easy to let someone be in control of you when they are always in your face. Step back and take some time to yourself so that you can see things more clearly. This will ensure that you will have the strength to take control back where it has been lost.
Finally, get a few boundary statements together and start using them to get things back on track. These might be things like: “I am sorry that you don’t like what I am doing, but it is not your choice to make.” Or “I cannot make you angry and I am not going to change myself to try and make up for that.”
Some of these may sound mean but you have to understand that if you do not take control that sooner or later you will grow to resent the person in control of you. So take each of these to heart and begin getting control of your relationship today.
