Understand what it means to communicate with a man. There are a lot of myths perpetrated by so called “experts” out there, telling you that the key to a successful marriage is “communication.” While communication is no doubt important, you must understand that men and women communicate differently. To be a great wife, learn to speak your husband’s language. That means no endless discussions about trivial matters or what he did wrong. Absolutely no nagging. When you want something done, ask for it sweetly and only once. After that, let it go. Also, physicality counts for a lot. Touching, hugging, kissing, and sex are a means of communication too. So save the endless chit chat for your girlfriends.
Sex. Sex is the glue that holds your marital bond together. Sex is not just a physical act, it’s also a way of increasing your trust and bond. Men need to have sex with their wives. It’s their main way of communicating their feelings for you and also their recreation. So, if your husband wants sex every day, do it! Make sex exciting for him. Experiment with toys, videos, and negligee, if that’s what he likes. Trust me, if he’s not having sex with you he’s going to have sex with someone else, so make it special!
Keep up your looks. While we live in an age of “self acceptance” where we’re told to love of bodies “the way they are” that does not change biology. Men were born visual creatures and visual creatures they will remain. Therefore, look your best! Keep fit by exercising and eating sensibly (this will do wonders for your disposition too), wear make up, keep your hair clean and shiny, keep your nails manicured, and don’t forget to dress nicely. Your husband wants you to look like his lover, not his mom, so dress accordingly. I’m not telling you to go overboard here. You don’t have to look like Adriana Lima, just clean, pretty, and presentable. You’ll feel better too.
Keep your own interests. This is vital for having an interesting and healthy marriage. Remember that twice a week lunch you used to have with your girlfriends? What about that weekly tennis game? Or that novel you started before you were married? You get the idea! Being married doesn’t give you license to become boring or brain dead. Make sure you have something interesting to talk to your husband about at the end of each day.
Don’t try to change your husband. This is crucial. First of all, it doesn’t work. People only change when they want to. Secondly, it’s highly detrimental to your marriage. Wives often try to change EVERYTHING about their husbands-from their eating habits to their choice of friends to the way they dress. This is effective if your main goals are to get divorced or have your husband have an affair. So, accept him exactly as he is, no changes, and you’ll discover that the more accepting you are of him the more loving he’ll be in return.
