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Step 1

Admit that it’s not working. The hardest part about making a change is usually acknowledging that it needs to happen. Don’t sugarcoat the situation. If you are unhappy, then only you can turn that around.

  • Step 2

    Take stock. Analyze your relationships to see what works and what doesn’t. Note whether you think the other person will be receptive to the necessary changes. Prepare yourself accordingly.

  • Step 3

    Get clear about your needs. In order to set boundaries in your relationships, you must know what your deal breakers are. Knowing the changes you want to make is great, but you should also have an idea of how you want things to change as well. Be willing to compromise when necessary.

  • Step 4

    Say no. Do not do things because you feel guilty or obligated. Do not over commit. Exercise your right to choice and take care of yourself.

  • Step 5

    Communicate effectively. Once you are sure about your stance, you need to articulate it. Let the other person(s) know how you feel. Present your case firmly and compassionately.

  • Step 6

    Deal with the consequences. When you set boundaries in relationships, you must be prepared for some backlash. Many people don’t like change, but that doesn’t mean you should back down. Allow a reasonable period of time for adjustment.

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