1. Make friends with your heartbreak.
2. Deal appropriately with negative thoughts.
3. Turn up the radio. Science suggests that music has a therapeutic effect. (No, not that breakup album with the sad, lovesick songs.) Blare some of your favorite, feel-good tunes: Listening to them can trigger the release of endorphins, lifting your spirits and combating stress.
4. Know the difference between grief and depression. There is often a fine line between the two, and normal heartbreak can sometimes transform into full-blown depression.
5. Feel some kindness toward your ex. “The most potent step you can take in your own healing, extend loving kindness to your ex.” Although that seems counterintuitive and next to impossible, the process of extending your heart to someone whom you have no intention of loving ever again, she says, can actually bring feelings of stability and peace to your inner mind.
6. Write the story of your relationship. Do it from the third-person point of view in three different writing sessions. First, tell about how this woman met this man and how they fell in love. Then write about the love story and how it started going south. Finally, tell the story of the breakup: She said this; he did that. “Just taking that step back and looking at your circumstance as if you were describing someone else may sound silly, but it helps you bring a very valuable perspective, And it also helps you look at your story from the stance of someone who’s OK instead of someone who’s embroiled in agony.
7. Steer clear of the self-help section. Bookstore shelves are crammed with books that say, “This is your fault. You created this situation by the way you thought, or by carrying forward childhood wounds, But that’s not true. “Don’t try to come up with reasons on why it happened and how to prevent it from happening again. Allow yourself to feel heartbreak-that’s what actually gets us over it.”
8. Give love. Perhaps at no other time than post-breakup do we want love so much, . But instead of desperately searching, give love, to anyone, in any situation. “There’s always a chance of loving, “That is how you balance the sorrow and rage from the heartbreak you’re dealing with-by giving love to whatever situation or person you are interacting with. That is the secret.”
