Define goals and expectations early on: Outline broad and specific goals first by yourself and then with your partner. Realize that some of these expectations are likely to change as your relationship progresses. That’s fine so long as the foundational expectations—the conditions that are truly important—remain the same. Examples of foundational expectations: Your partner should love you. Your partner should respect you. Your partner should not cheat on you.
Communicate frequently (within reason):Depending on whether or not you live together and whether or not you’re dating each other exclusively, you should speak anyone from several times a day to once a week. It’s true that the more you talk to a person, the better you get to know your partner; the basis to every successful romantic relationship means having a strong understanding of who your partner is.
Communicate using different methods: Sometimes face-to-face conversations are not the best way to discuss a matter. If an issue’s particularly sensitive, don’t ignore it because it will only become bigger; instead, write letters or emails to your partner explaining your concerns, how your feel, etc. If you just want to flirt and not talk about anything too serious, phone calls, texting, and IM are all great ways to keep in touch with your partner.
Don’t compare yourselves to other couples:It’s simpler said than done but, don’t compete! It doesn’t matter what’s happening between your friend and her partner. It doesn’t matter that your brother is getting married before you. You and your partner are a different set of people so your relationship cannot possibly be identical to anyone else’s. Live your own love story.
Be frank about sex even if it’s embarrassing: Sex (or some kind of physical intimacy) is a part of every romantic relationship so it must be acknowledged. Even if you’re only at the kissing stage, you have to be able to talk about the physical aspect of your relationship. Make sure that both people are comfortable with the relationship’s sexual pacing; maybe one partner thought you jumped too quickly into “second base,” for instance. Keep in mind that your sexual appetites will probably differ (sex once a month is fine for some people while others prefer once a day) and that you must work to achieve a compromise. Another factor to take into consideration is this:perhaps one partner wants to wait until the two of you are engaged or married before having sex. Whatever the case, it’s important that you do not pressure your partner in any way and not be afraid to discuss fantasies, preferences, and questions with your beloved one.
Say “I love you” only when you mean it: Never, ever use the words “I love you” unless it’s sincere; don’t use the phrase in order to manipulate your partner and pressure him or her into doing something s/he doesn’t want to do (in fact, don’t try to manipulate your partner period). These three words are intended to convey fondness and commitment. Don’t use them too casually or they lose their meaning. On the other hand, don’t use them so rarely that your partner begins to doubt your feelings for him or her either. Say “I love you” often enough that your partner believes such words are true but not so often that starts to ignore or even forget the words’ meaning.
