Be observant. Know your lovers habits and moods. Learn the times when closeness or distance is best.
Be attentive without being overpowering.
Complement – and mean it. Don’t do it all the time. Too much of anything becomes blasé. Watch for good moments. Complements don’t have to be verbal. A hug, stroking of the hair, caress of the arm – they show you care.
Say thank you. Be gracious. Accept complements modestly.
If you’re a gentleman, open doors for your dear one, even when it’s raining and it’s out of your way. Even when they tell you it’s not necessary. Of course it’s not necessary unless they have no arms. You are not doing it because it’s necessary. You’re doing it as an expression of your love for this person.
Offer your help when your lover is working on something. They may not need it, but the offer is very pleasant. Perhaps you only need be there to chat while they work. Be there in times of need. But don’t get in their hair if they need to concentrate and there’s nothing you can do.
Look at your lover when in conversation. No TV or newspapers while in conversation. Take out the earphones. Put away the telephones. Listen. Listen with your ears and your eyes. Listen to what they have to say. Don’t interrupt. Watch their expression. Look into their eyes. Have you ever noticed the amount of time young lovers spend just looking at each others. Old lovers do that too.
Smile. Look at faces of the elderly. Look at the facial wrinkles. You can tell which ones have smile wrinkles and which ones have – other characteristics. If you’re lucky enough to live to old age, which do you want? Your face is a mask you develop over a lifetime. “But I have a hard life – waa waa waa.” Look around prince or princess. Other people have hard lives too, and some of these people still manage a smile. You may not have a choice as to your situation, but you have one major choice you can make all the time – you can decide on your attitude. Negative or Positive. Your choice. Which direction will you steer your life? I choose to smile. The world looks so much more pleasant when you smile.
Lead by example. Your loved one is not responding as you would like? Are you going to die tomorrow? You have time. Be patient. Love is a lifelong practice. You may never be perfect at it, but it’s the striving for perfection that makes us the best we can be. It may take years for your lover to see the love you’ve been sharing and to begin to appreciate it. They will. And it’s ever so good for you to continue to practice. You can only get better if you try. And one day your lover will follow suit.
This is more than enough to get you started. There is much, much more, but you need to discover this for yourself. This is a journey where the scenery just gets better and better. It’s work, but what wonderful work.
