Here are a few hints to make you more approachable with a few simple tweaks to your body language.
If I could give you just one piece of advice, this would be it. Never underestimate the power of a smile. Often consumed with our stressful lives, it is easy to forget about such a basic expression that not only renders you friendly and approachable, but can also brighten someone’s day.
A quick smile when you see someone you know, or someone you’d like to get to know, makes a world of difference.
Open Body Language:
Folding your arms across your chest and/or sitting with your legs crossed perfectly illustrates a classic “closed off” position. To open up, keep your arms by your side and try to cross your leg toward your person of interest.
Let me ask you something. What color eyes does your boss have? What about your local barista? Can you remember? Eye contact is one of the most important parts of all human connection. Unfortunately, most of us lack the nerve to go beyond the initial brief glance.
Pay attention to “Approach Invitations” in the above video. A split second glance and a quick smile usually won’t get you the man of your dreams. You really have to make it a 1-2 second experience for him.
When Someone Approaches You:
When someone strikes up a conversation with you, keep the dialogue positive. Try to be in the moment and actually enjoy the conversation at hand; do your best to filter out any distractions.
Putting It All Together:
Let’s return to the beginning with our hypothetical woman who is wondering why the guy she is eyeing won’t return the attention. Might she be holding her drink in front of her defensively deterring his approach, or is she just sitting in a hard to reach location?