Take ownership of your feelings. State your perspective in a way that does not place blame on the other individual, but rather presents the situation in an objective way and conveys how the circumstance affected you. For example, instead of saying, “You’re lazy. Why don’t you help me around the house?” try lovingly explaining the situation to your spouse: “When you don’t help, it makes me feel unloved and unappreciated.” Insulting and finger-pointing is a sure-fire way to lose an argument and weaken a relationship. Try a more positive approach.