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  • Find something about the person you are interested in. This could be something the two of you have in common or something that you can compliment them on. Use this interest to strike up a conversation.


Ask the person to do something non-threatening like meeting in a public place during the day. Go to a sporting event or for a walk in the park. If you have mutual friends, make it a group date. Avoid being isolated with a person you don’t know very well.

  • Be honest about who you are and what you want out of the relationship. You don’t want to start a relationship on a dishonest note. Be yourself and don’t try to be someone you aren’t. This will allow the person to like you as the person you are, not a pumped up, exaggerated version of yourself. Remember, if the relationship becomes long term, the truth will eventually come out.

  • Don’t be aggressive or come on too strong. If you have to force someone to go out with you, you shouldn’t go out.

  • Don’t send mixed messages, especially about sex. Be aware of your own  body language and other non-verbal communication.

  • Show interest in the other person. Find out about his/her likes and dislikes, family and friends, values and beliefs, and goals and dreams. Really get to know the other person and don’t make snap judgments about them. Try not to dominate the conversation by only talking about yourself.


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