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There aren’t any quick fixes or easy buttons for making a marriage/relationship work.  

    • Get help. Seek help from a professional counselor.  Go to counseling as a couple so that the therapy is not one-sided.

Discuss the strengths of the relationship with your partner.  Make a list of what each person is doing right and focus on the positives.

  • Schedule date nights. Weekly or bi-weekly, set up a date where the focus of the evening is just on you as a couple. Try not to discuss work or children or stresses. Think about the things that made you fall in love before you married.

  • Do little things to say “I love you.” Send a text. Leave a note on the refrigerator. Put a picture of the two of you in your spouse’s car with a message. Leave a note in the sock drawer. Surprises are a fun way to keep things exciting for both partners.

  • Learn your spouse’s love language. The five types of love languages are words of affirmation, quality time, receiving gifts, acts of service and physical touch. By learning how your spouse expresses her love, you will better understand her needs in the relationship as well as your own.

  • Gaze into your partner’s eyes. By looking directly into his eyes and taking a moment to really see them, you are showing that you care about him. Do this often. It may feel silly at first, so keep practicing.

  • Don’t give up. There are so many ways to bring new life to the relationship. Keep looking for new ideas.